Crazy College Days Part Two

July 3, 2008 at 12:00 am | Posted in Aggies, Blast from the Past, Military | 6 Comments

I was a little bit hesitant to write this follow-up post to Crazy College Days because to accurately tell the tale I’m going to have to use some language that will make for some interesting search engine hits. Apparently it was silly for me to worry about that. Recently someone actually came to my blog after searching for “Marine whores”. It would have been even funnier if the person who made that search was the visitor from the Army National Guard Bureau, but it wasn’t. I also still get hits for “Heather Locklear naked” and even had the infamous “pro bass fishing crack” hit, so I don’t think this post will make things too much worse than they already are.

If you haven’t already read the first installment in Crazy College Days, I recommend that you do before reading the rest of this post. If you have read it (or if you have decided to ignore my advice like most people do), get ready to hear about the experience I had with Dorm Girl and the Corps of Cadets at Texas A&M University.

Dorm Girl continued to exclusively date guys in the Corps even after football season was over. Eventually, she settled into a relationship with a cadet. Not “boots”, but also not a fellow freshman. One day Dorm Girl was asking if any of us had nice dresses at school with us. She was trying to drum up a date for a friend of her boyfriend. His unit (or whatever it was called) was having what I think they called a “Dining In” that week and this particular cadet couldn’t get his own date. The Corps of Cadets had their own dining hall- Duncan- and students only got to eat there if they were either (1) a cadet or (2) the date of a cadet for an event like a “Dining In”. I was curious about Duncan and had a nice enough dress with me, so I agreed to go.

In hindsight, it’s quite clear to me that there should have been some alarm bells because this cadet couldn’t get his own date. There were a lot of girls on campus like Dorm Girl who exclusively dated in the Corps and there were people like me who were curious about Duncan. The cadet really should have been able to obtain his own date. I didn’t give enough thought to the situation back then though and I said I’d go.

A few days later with my hair styled, make-up freshly applied and wearing the aforementioned dress and a pair of heels, I walked across campus to Duncan with Dorm Girl. We met up with her boyfriend, my “date” for the event and a few couples. The meal started off normal enough and I had a chance to check out Duncan. Nothing terribly exciting, but I wasn’t regretting coming or anything like that. However, my “date” did leave a lot to be desired as a conversationalist. I had already started to think this was part of his problem when he brought up a topic of conversation that I still can’t believe he thought was appropriate for the situation.

My “date” started talking with the other cadets about where they would all be doing their training that summer. I don’t remember which place he was saying he didn’t want to go to, but I do remember where he said he wanted to go and why. My loser “date” wanted a training that involved a good bit of time on the South Texas border…with easy access to Mexico because the whores were cheap and his pay would go farther. This is what he thought was good dinner conversation around a couple of his buddies and their dates (I also need to point out that two of the buddies had already stated they would be going to the place he wanted to go to before he started talking about the cheap whores).

I’m not sure what was worse, that he thought it was OK to talk about this, that his buddies didn’t try hard to shut him up until he started getting more out of line than I’m willing to write about on this blog, or that I was so much of a wuss that I didn’t do the right thing and throw a glass of water in his face before leaving the dining hall. It sure would have been fun to hear how he explained what happened to the ROTC advisors present at the dinner. I guess the saddest part is that I wouldn’t even call this the worst date I’ve had.



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  1. Hey now, there’s no shame in the world’s oldest profession, haha.

  2. I wish my “date” had had some shame. If he didn’t grow up/change, then I really pity the women he’s been involved with since then.

  3. Your last line made me lol. It reminded me of my days at Texas Tech where most of the guys were jerks – especially frat boys.

  4. Unfortunately, the worst date ever happened long after I was out of college with a man/boy from NYC who I doubt ever even considered being a frat boy. It was recent enough that I still shudder thinking about it (or bad enough depending on your perspective).

  5. This made me laugh and laugh. I can’t wait to hear about your worst date ever! How long do we have to hold out for that story?

  6. Hmmm…I’m not sure when/if I’ll post the worst date ever story. I did email it to a friend so it is already more or less written, but I’d have to edit out some identifying details. Plus I think it is long enough it would need to be split into a few posts. I’ll have to think about that.

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